My Living Shadow System Devours To Make Me Stronger Chapter 862 - 863: I Can Explain

From a tender age, Renata had been coerced into a maturity that exceeded her years. Her household existed in a state of perpetual vigilance.

Damon’s brow furrowed as his gaze settled on her. He knew he would be a total fool if he permitted the presence of a captivating woman on his lap to distract him from the gravity of the situation.

While the arrangement appeared intentionally provocative at first glance, it wasn't designed for mere titillation.

Renata’s position on Damon’s thighs wasn't born of lust; it was a calculated move for control through shared vulnerability.

Seduction wasn't her primary goal. Instead, she was testing a much more precarious boundary.

’Is it possible to be near you without becoming a tool for your use?’

There was a jarring contrast between her physical proximity and her internal walls. Even as she pressed her form against his, she maintained a strict emotional distance, a dissonance that defined her very essence.

This singular philosophy served as the thesis for her entire life.

"Whatever you hold dear is simply a handle for another to seize."

This wasn't mere cynicism; it was a doctrine of survival. It stood in stark opposition to his own worldview.

Renata’s icy demeanor didn't stem from a lack of passion. She was cold because she had been conditioned to view emotions as dangerous liabilities.

Perhaps most unsettling was the fact that she harbored no apparent bitterness toward her parents for this upbringing.

She understood their reasoning.

While Damon merely claimed to value nothing, Renata had genuinely attempted to live that way.

The scars of that effort were visible.

He had to admit that he’d always sensed a strange aura around her, though he had never scrutinized her closely. In the back of his mind, he believed that if she ever betrayed him, he could simply suppress her using Demon Dominate.

"Efficiency was the core of my upbringing. I was told our sole purpose was to serve Lord Ashcroft, and that he was the path to our salvation."

A soft sigh escaped her, her chest heaving slightly as she carefully managed her breathing.

"I was permitted no personal ownership. Occasionally, my parents would buy me a gift, wait until I grew attached to it, and then forcibly take it away."

A faint, melancholic smile touched her lips. Her violet eyes lost their luster, drained of their characteristic self-assurance.

"Eventually, I made a friend. She was just a young human girl."

A genuine smile flickered across Renata’s face at the recollection.

"Her life was the polar opposite of mine. She didn't spend her days buried in studies. Her smiles weren't practiced in a mirror. She simply loved flowers and played in the dirt like any normal child."

Renata felt a mixture of envy and deep admiration for her.

The girl residing in her castle was the daughter of a maid. Her mother had succumbed to sickness, and her father had been ended by a passing noble.

Being cautious by nature, Renata had thoroughly investigated her. She knew the girl’s history better than the girl did herself.

Soon, the girl was officially appointed as her servant.

Renata had never possessed a personal maid before. Despite having many attendants, none were exclusively hers. Even then, she spent months keeping the girl at a distance, resisting any bond.

However, despite the cruel reputation of demons in dark folklore, they were beings of intense emotion. For Renata, the simple passage of time became the bridge to affection.

She became more than a servant. She was a friend—the only one she had.

"Mira, how can you stay so cheerful after losing everything?"

The young maid gave a radiant grin.

"Sadness can't last forever. A smile says more than a million words. You should try it too. You’d be beautiful. More beautiful than anyone I’ve ever seen."

Renata let out a soft, honest laugh.

She had few treasures, but she truly loved Mira.

The following morning, Mira never arrived.

Searching for her, Renata stepped into the corridor, only to be met by a thick, metallic scent.

The smell of blood.

As she rounded the corner, the color fled from her face.

The sight became a permanent scar on her mind.

Mira’s body was impaled, her eyes wide with lingering horror. Her hair was matted and stained a dark, violent crimson.

The sound of soft footsteps approached from behind.

"Why?" she whispered.

Her father sighed, his voice carrying a strange note of shared pain.

"You are hurting, Renata. That pain exists only because you chose to value something. You gave them a handle to wound you."

She sank to the floor, her chest tightening under the weight of agonizing grief.

She wanted this pain to vanish.

She vowed never to value anything again.

Why was Mira the one who had to die?

The fault lay with her.

Fueled by fury, she turned against her parents. She sought to strip something away from them, but she realized she had no idea what they actually cared about.

In that moment of rage, her will ignited, awakening the potential of her attribute.

Zero.

A magic attribute with the terrifying power to nullify existence.

But her attempt failed.

They were far too powerful, and she couldn't scratch them. They were her parents, after all.

Damon’s expression darkened as he listened. To endure such a thing was horrific.

"I only want to prove that they were wrong," she whispered.

"What happened to them? Your parents, I mean."

Renata took a breath and rested her head against his shoulder, a gesture that was both soft and intentional.

"They were called to the front lines by an imperial summons to fight the demon army. They died in the conflict, leaving the house to me. As the sole survivor, I chose my own path."

Damon shifted his hand to her waist, steadying her on his lap.

"So you transformed your house into a major economic power."

She gave a slow nod.

"I did, though it brought its own headaches. Suddenly, I was under a microscope. Some vultures even tried to force a marriage just to grab my lands."

Damon let out a sigh.

"And how does all that lead to you picking me over Ashcroft?"

She tapped her chin, lost in thought.

"Ashcroft belongs to a different age. My ancestors served him, and their loyalty cost me everything. The unknown god preaches that mortals should have their own agency. I want to choose for myself."

She looked at him with a smile that was finally real—neither seductive nor a ploy.

"I am Renata Malcrist. A demon."

Damon offered a small smile, touching the spot on his head where his horns had once been ground down.

"Damon Grey. Still human. At least for now. But I could use a lesson on how to conceal these demon traits."

She looked at him and laughed, leaning in until they were inches apart.

"And what do I get in return? You’ll owe me some very intimate favors, cutie."

"What in the world is happening here?"

The voice sounded like it had been dragged through the depths of the abyss.

Damon’s hands immediately flew off Renata’s waist. This situation was far more dangerous than if Evangeline had walked in.

He looked toward the entrance of the balcony.

His heart sank at the sight of them.

Sylvia was already radiating a murderous aura.

Beside her stood Lilith Astranova, watching him with an expression of cold, deadpan revulsion.

"This isn't what you think. I can explain everything!"